"Grandaddy, Things Change!"

This is a statement that DD made in 1988 when we moved away from an abusive home. I took the kids and three suitcases, that was all! The next day grandaddy was pushing DD in the swing and out of her sweet little four year old mouth came the words, "Grandaddy, things change."

It's time for me to seperate my personal blog from my professional one. If you're looking for my professional blog, check out my links! That blog will not link to this one! For obvious reasons!

I'm In LOVE with the MUSIC of Carly Simon

In December I bought a thee CD boxed set of music by Carly Simon. I've almost worn the crazy CD's out by now or at least worn out my mother with listening to them in the car!

Carly has a booklet of sorts in the boxed set. She writes about the music she sings and talks about how she knows when a song is just right. I thought that it had a lot to do with the way I feel about my scrapbook layouts. How do you know when they're just right? Do they have just the right pieces in just the right places? Does it need a little more, or does it need a little less.

Here's what Carly has to say about her song writing:
I've always wondered what would happen if I held on to one song long enough to make it perfect by my standards. I would keep it locked up in my creative chamber and feed it daily with new ideas, better chord changes, a dream-inspired alteration in the melody, a more sonorous word, more alliteration, simplification, cleaner lines. I suppose it would be somewhat like raising the perfect child. At what point does it become a monster child? Robot-like or over studied, precious? One of the interesting problems the songwriter faces is when to let the song go. Often it is just a matter of deadline and I think back and look at the songs I have chosen to include here, it is significant, the part that practicality plays. You gotta get it done. But when there is no deadline what is it that makes you finish a song? I have come to believe that you must fall in love. When you really fall in love with a song, it becomes perfect for that moment in time. Maybe in a year you'll look back and say: "How could I have loved that song so much?" But in the first blush, the honeymoon period, the song can do no wrong. That is when you want to shout it to the world and parade it in front of your friends. I think that's what the act of creativity must be about. It's about making something you believe is better than you are, and for a moment, you merge with it and think it's you and you are it. Even when I am in a state of self loathing I can write something that I fall in love with. Deluded though I might be, it makes me feel better about myself and it usually inspires me to write another song. This goes not only for songwriting, but for fixing dinner or arranging flowers. At some point, and mostly it's a combination of accident and inspiration (being led by a larger hand), it comes together in a way that seems just right at the time, and that is the time to let it go. Sometimes it's just because it fits for the day. It may not be the greatest song, but it fits your soul at the moment and therefore speaks honestly. So you let it go out there into the great, big, kind, cruel and indifferent universe. .........

All Night

All night by Carly Simon

I have no need of half of anything
No half time, no half of a man's attention
Give me all the earth and sky
And at the same time add a new dimension
Half the truth is of no use
Give it all, give it all to meI can stand itI am strong that way

Give me all night
Give me the full moon
And if I can't take the whole of you
Give it to me anyway
Give me all night
'Till the last star fades
And if you can't take my heart and soul
Take it from me anyway

Don't give me fountains, I need waterfalls
And, when I cry, my tears will fill an ocean
The pain of love, I'll accept it all
As long as you'll join me in that emotion

Half of lovin' is no fun
Give it all, give it all to me
Give me all night
I can stand it
I am strong that way
Give me the full moon
And if I can't take the whole of you
Give it to me anyway
Give me all night
Give me the full moon
And if I can't take the whole of you
Give it to me anyway

Don't leave me guessing alone
Don't walk me half the way home
You can do that tomorrow
Just give me .Give me all night
Give me the full moon
And if I can't take the whole of you
Give it to me anyway

Give me all night
'Till the last star fades
And if you can't take my heart and soul
Take it from me anyway
'Till the last star fades
And if I can't take the whole of you
Give it to me anyway

Give me all night
Give me the full moon
Give it to me anyway
'Till the last star fades
And if you can't take my heart and soul...

"You're too sensative!"

Awwh, bull shit! What a cop out of a thing to say! I'm mad at that man of mine again!

What happened to, "you look nice"?

What happened to, "these sheets feel/smell good"?

What happened to, "you look and smell and feel good"?

What happened to a goodnight kiss?

What are we doing wrong?

What are we doing right?

What happened to "Thanks for taking the time to pick out these

Say Goodbye to Joe because he's all Walshed Up!

Don't you think it's pathetic how Joe seems like he is singing with no teeth or a mouth full of marbels or whatever! I wonder when this video was taken? This means we're just a bunch of saggy baggy old gimp and limp washed up wanabe hippies!

In the live DVD of the Eagles Hell Freezes Over Joe looks pretty decent but this version is def not his best! I like the music, it reminds me of college days and driving across LA to visit with my sister.

Appletini

For Jodi! We missed you girl!

The Prayer Lyrics

JOSH GROBAN LYRICS"The Prayer"(feat. Charlotte Church)I pray you'll be our eyesAnd watch us where we goAnd help us to be wiseIn times when we don't knowLet this be our prayerAs we go our wayLead us to a placeGuide us with your GraceTo a place where we'll be safeLa luce che tu daiI pray we'll find your lightNel cuore resteraAnd hold it in our heartsA ricordarci cheWhen stars go out each nightL'eterna stella seiNella mia preghieraLet this be our prayerQuanta fede c'eWhen shadows fill our dayLead us to a placeGuide us with your grace Give us faith so we'll be safe. Sogniamo un mondo senza piu violenza Un mondo di giustizia e di speranzaOgnuno dia la mano al suo vicinoSimbolo di pace e di fraternitaLa forza che ci daiWe ask that life be kindE'il desiderio cheAnd watch us from aboveOgnuno trovi amoreWe hope each soul will findIntorno e dentro a seAnother soul to loveLet this be our prayerLet this be our prayerJust like every childJust like every childNeeds to find a place,Guide us with your graceGive us faith so we'll be safeE la fede cheHai acceso in noiSento che ci salvera

In Loving Memory

Ernest Lee Harris, Jr. DDS April 19, 1930-December 8, 2004

I love and miss you daddy, your girl!

JOY

I am full of JOY! I am finding healing in all that I can. Listening to music much more than before and little surprises coming my way from the SJ Gals! I can't show you my work until it is published but then for sure it will be here!

I need a new song today so say goodbye to SMILE but keep on smiling!

Our Wedding Day

"I do", said he. "Me too", said she. And they became a family.

May 16, 1991 Guernsey, Wyoming

SMILE

Today is December 5, it's been a while since i posted a real lingo long. I can't say that this one will be especially long but I do want to say that I hope you take the time to hear the beautiful voice of Josh Groban and the lyrics of this song. Music is a way to heal my heart. I could have chosen The Prayer that Josh sang with Charlotte Church as I love it very much. It's time to keep moving forward and this song SMILE has come to my mind many times and just today did I discover that Josh sang it. He does such a nice job. We saw him in concert about two years ago and he was awesome! I recommend you go if you have the chance! Enjoy and SMILE!

I've Gone Beta

Wow, who'd a 'thunk it! They let me in to the beta blogger! Gonna play around with this tomorrow! Woo HOO!

Giving Thanks

I can't believe how happy everyone is and how well we are all getting along! I love my two kids and they seem so happy to be together. DD is so happy to see her brother and DS is so much more selfconfident because of is High School Diploma! Here in FL we are thankful for the cool weather. This is a good time of life~

I'm SO Happy!

A Good Night's Rest

What a difference a day makes. I'm well rested and up early. I feel so much better today. Don't know exactly what I'll do beside the grocery shopping and the sheet changing but I'm sure I'll find something!

DREAMS

Today I got a circle journal in the mail. The topic is DREAMS. I am near to the end of those contributing to this journal so I have a lot of precessors ideas to draw on. Most of the pages are about childhood dreams of marriage, mother hood, the white picket fence and traveling. I too have had those dreams and seen them realized. I still love to travel but have forgotten how to DREAM. I need a new vision, a new idea, something to be excited about. I just don't quite know how to go about it. I don't want to dream about being a grandmother because A.) My kids aren't ready to be parents and B.) That is something that I cannot control. What are my dreams? How do I dream and consequently shape my future?

My wish is to be healthy, to be happy, to manage my depression so that I am not suffering so! I've stopped dreaming about being thin. Do women my age actually loose weight? What are the odds?

I've learned the only person you can change is yourself. I'd be happy with that! I want a dream a vision a plan for my remaining life. A plan that will allow me to be productive and happy in this next season. I don't think it's money but having and using the money you have wisely. I think it's happiness..........I want happiness.

Ten Days Later

Today, if he were still living, would be my parents 57th wedding anniversary. Mom was a little sad, but she will be ok...Oh, how selfish of me, today also marks the death of DH's father in 1999. A lot of water under the bridge. In many ways I am glad to say that the two Dad's don't know the "trouble I've seen". Guess they had their own troubles, I'm sure. More news to come re: my new found football compromise with DH. I am so getting a wireless laptop. For now, the battery is dead! I hate it when that happens1

Labor Day Weekend

Well I'm off in about an hour to go with mother over to the coast for the weekend. DH will join us tonight and DD will drive over tomorrow! I'm looking forward to it and can't decide to take my scrapping' stuff or not!

The worst thing we have to do is to go by the monument place and double check the grave stone for my parents graves for correctness before it is installed. It's bad enough that I have to remember that my daddy is gone but I'm going to really have to suck it up as my mother's name will be on the marker even though, she is still living since it's a dual headstone. I dread it!

Now that TS Ernesto is gone, from here anyway, I feel so much better. I hate the highs and lows I have in my life. Dealing with depression is just totally awful. I'm a fighter not a quitter so I will keep on trying until I get it right!

Hope the atmosphere at the condo is pleasant and who knows when I'll come back home! All that good civilization and shopping over there in Daytona! I'll be in hog heaven!

So THAT's Why It's Called a DEPRESSION

I live in Sebring, we are in the center of the state and in the center of the now Tropical Depression Ernesto. The "weather" seems to be focused more toward the east coast and as the afternoon wears on there's always a fear of tornado's. We are accustomed to afternoon thunderstorms with lots of rain and lightening.

IMHO the government is now taking every precaution to protect the public at large and in the process scaring people, like me, to pieces!

I am thankful that God protects us, as his storms always demonstrate his sovereign hand! I must confess my Faith did not exhibit itself very well these past few days as I dreaded the storm. This is an example to me to let God handle the other "storms" in my life and trust Him with His protective hand.

Thanks to all of you who have been checking in on us and praying for those still waiting for their turn for Ernesto to pass.

Ernesto

Finally, it has dawned on me why I am so depressed today! I fight depression in general but this Monday morning just absolutely sucked for me! No matter what I did it just didn't seem to help. So, I picked myself up by the flip flops and made myself get out of the house.

There's nowhere good to go around here. The mall stinks and even if it was a good one I shouldn't be out spending money.

I did need to go to Wally World and get some essentials like deodorant and laundry soap. Well, every stinking' person in three counties was there buying water and peanut butter. I finally decided to get what I needed as fast as possible and get the heck out of Dodge!

We have soooooooo many elderly people in this town. They are just oblivious to anything going on around them. Stand in the aisle and "farmer chat". Just irks me, they should do that on the shuffleboard court! Oh, it's too freakin' hot outside to be outside unless you're in a pool.

Anyway, it's that damn Ernesto, I am so sick and tired of hurricane's and tropical storms I could puke! It's all my scrap crap that freaks me out. Who cares about the rest! Every year it seems all the books go into plastic containers and then back out on the shelves. I just can't face it. So, I'm going to take my chances for now! If it stresses me out that bad then something wrong!

It must be all the TV hype, we never had all that growing up. No long drawn out moment to moment detail on what could/might happen. We just got the batteries ready and stored up canned food. Heck, we didn't even have bottled water. We just filled up the bathtubs with extra water. Of course, it probably didn't hurt that I was a child and knew my parents would take care of me.

The kids are grown, it's DH and one grown son. I'll get some canned food another day. The propane tanks are full and it's DH's job to get gasoline for the generator! Yes, we have a generator. My dad bought it for my mother before he died. I've got a flashlight and extra batteries and a pool full of water. What else could I ask for?

So, goodbye worries over Ernesto! Wow, I feel so much better now! Thanks everyone!