A Good Night's Rest

What a difference a day makes. I'm well rested and up early. I feel so much better today. Don't know exactly what I'll do beside the grocery shopping and the sheet changing but I'm sure I'll find something!

DREAMS

Today I got a circle journal in the mail. The topic is DREAMS. I am near to the end of those contributing to this journal so I have a lot of precessors ideas to draw on. Most of the pages are about childhood dreams of marriage, mother hood, the white picket fence and traveling. I too have had those dreams and seen them realized. I still love to travel but have forgotten how to DREAM. I need a new vision, a new idea, something to be excited about. I just don't quite know how to go about it. I don't want to dream about being a grandmother because A.) My kids aren't ready to be parents and B.) That is something that I cannot control. What are my dreams? How do I dream and consequently shape my future?

My wish is to be healthy, to be happy, to manage my depression so that I am not suffering so! I've stopped dreaming about being thin. Do women my age actually loose weight? What are the odds?

I've learned the only person you can change is yourself. I'd be happy with that! I want a dream a vision a plan for my remaining life. A plan that will allow me to be productive and happy in this next season. I don't think it's money but having and using the money you have wisely. I think it's happiness..........I want happiness.

Ten Days Later

Today, if he were still living, would be my parents 57th wedding anniversary. Mom was a little sad, but she will be ok...Oh, how selfish of me, today also marks the death of DH's father in 1999. A lot of water under the bridge. In many ways I am glad to say that the two Dad's don't know the "trouble I've seen". Guess they had their own troubles, I'm sure. More news to come re: my new found football compromise with DH. I am so getting a wireless laptop. For now, the battery is dead! I hate it when that happens1